"Why?"

In the past week we have entered the world of "Why?" It's a lot less fun than I had imagined.

Well, sometimes it is fun. You may have noticed that recent posts have addressed why people get married and why tree service workers wear straps. Not only do those questions have answers, but they're entertaining, too. However, increasingly often the question "why?" leads to a dead end.

I've always enjoyed his curious, engaged, intellectually demanding queries, and I am thrilled to answer those. But today we got these questions: Why did we leave the party? (Because it was time to go home.) Why are we going home? (Because it was time to leave the party.) Why are we going home in the car? (Because it was too far to walk.) Why is it too far to walk? (Because the party was in Oakland, and we don't live in Oakland.)

I read somewhere that the relentless asking of "why?" is one way small children engage in dialog. They don't know how else to keep the conversation going, so they ask "why?" I can understand that, and I'm learning how to derail the "why" train by answering a related question, one that I actually want to answer, and one that moves the conversation in a productive direction. I've also had some success in asking him a question in return, if only to exact some pale vengeance by making Isaac answer "I don't know" himself.

But sometimes it's clear that he really does need to know why -- or at least that he doesn't understand the situation at hand, and his continued asking of "why?" means only that our answers don't do anything to lessen his confusion. This might explain why he asked "Why did Daddy stop?" at every single stop sign between our house and the party we went to today. He understands stop lights, but apparently stop signs are more puzzling.

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He also asks "Why did Daddy get a flat tire?" nearly every time he notices a truck with a spare tire mounted on the back. He also frequently asks "Why do cars break down?" and "Why do cars smell like exhaust?" I've answered these questions literally 25 times, and yet he's not satisfied.

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No, not all of his questions are vehicle-related! These are just the ones I remember right now. I guess I might be getting a little vehicle-obsessed myself.