Emotions

Here are three glimpses into Isaac's emotional life:

1) Craig has been gone on a ten-day business trip. I've tried not to talk about him too much, since I don't want Isaac to dwell upon his absence. Isaac doesn't seem upset, though -- just curious. About once or twice a day, Isaac asks where Craig is, usually by saying, "Don't know what Daddy doing." However, it's a rhetorical question, because if you answer, "I don't know. What is Daddy doing?" Isaac will say, "Daddy in Amsterdam. Long way away!"

When Craig had been gone about four days, Isaac was asking about him as we were driving somewhere. From the back seat, I heard a little voice say seriously, "Isaac miss him. Love him."

2) As Isaac was getting ready for bed one night last week, he was playing with his stuffed pig and horse. Each of them had imaginary injuries and needed imaginary Band-Aids. I helped him patch up the animals, and complimented him on taking such good care of his friends.

Then Isaac told me that I had a cut, and that I needed a Band-Aid too. He carefully applied an imaginary bandage to my wound, and when I picked him up to complete our bed-time routine, he stroked my hair and said tenderly, "Isaac take good care of Mama."

3) Last Monday I was getting some food ready for guests who were about to arrive, and I therefore wasn't paying as much attention to Isaac as he would have liked. It wasn't until he began throwing his toy dishware that I took notice, however. "Hey!" I said sharply. "Don't throw those dishes! They're plastic; they could crack." So he moved on to the magnetic letters on the side of the refrigerator. He pulled one off, cocked his arm back to throw it, and looked right at me. I was about to suggest that he throw a ball instead, but I suddenly realized that all he needed was affection, not discipline (and certainly not punishment).

I picked him up and gave him a hug. He had been tense, but he immediately relaxed against my body, resting his head on my shoulder. And he said, "I sorry."

I was stunned. No one has taught him about apologies or forced him to say "I'm sorry" yet, so this, his first apology, was completely natural and sincere. I asked him why he was sorry, and he burrowed closer against me. "Throwing dishes," he said quietly.